Grey and less than ten stories tall, this city is best known as the site of the nicely-manicured Disneyland-on-the-Potomac in Northwest where the work of the federal government is done. However, it's also the home of hundreds of thousands of people who have no real representation in the federal government because DC is not in a state. Like Puerto Rico, Guam, American Samoa and the US Virgin Islands, DC is a colony. Unlike the other colonies, DC does not enjoy tropical weather or a safe distance from the Congress that runs it.

To say that Congress shits on DC is not just a figure of speech: untreated waste flows from Capitol Hill into the Anacostia River which runs through the poorest parts of town. Not to worry, though, Mayor Bowtie, Anthony Williams, has a plan to clean up Anacostia and move in rich out-of-towners, just as soon as the current undesirable residents can be made to leave.

Besides being the nation's governmental capital, the District is once again the per capita murder capital, under the leadership of Chief Charles Ramsey, who has just received a $25,000 a year raise for his efforts. Ramsey is also distinguished by his propensity for pre-emptive mass arrests of the many protests which come to town. Who cares if most murders go unsolved and 911 calls go unanswered as long as people aren't expressing their views in the streets?

Sites of note in DC:

http://www.umcp.org/fileupload/uploads/flemmingctr.jpg

Home of


More Info:



Back to the httpDisorientation Guide Index

Last edited on August 21, 2003 7:05 am.